{focus}
Only when your consciousness is totally focused on the moment you are in can you receive whatever gift, lesson, or delight that moment has to offer.
On the door of my studio I have a collage inspired by the Trouble Tree, a tale about a man who, upon returning home from work each night, would ‘hang his troubles’ on a tree in his yard before joining his family inside his house. It was my hope to be able to leave my troubles at my studio door, to have this room be a magical place free of worry or stress. This idea, while great in theory, is rather difficult for me to implement. Somehow the stressors in my life always seem to find their way into my studio wreaking havoc on my creative time.
Having a dedicated space isn’t enough. Having all the right supplies won’t cut it. Even carving out enough spare time in the day just won’t do the trick. It’s having the right state of mind. The ability to tap into one’s creativity regardless of circumstance, space or time limits. Proceessing negative emotion so that pain or anger can be a source of energy or inspiration rather than a deterrent. One of the biggest challenges I face as an artist is getting focused. Quieting all the mind chatter and arriving at that place when I am zoned into my art and not stifled by my fears or worries. Pushing past the emotion to that serene and calm place at my inner core. I saw The Artist’s Way as a possible venue to help me achieve better focus.
Overall, I am finding myself having to sift through Julia Cameron’s assumptions, generalizations and stereotypes, searching for the bits and pieces that resonate with me. I am finding her ‘what works for one will work for all’ methodology a bit rigid and impractical. I don’t know, maybe my expectations for this book are too high. Maybe it’s too early to form opinions. I do know she is a well respected author and this book has taken on a cult-like following, and I had so hoped to love this book as so many others have. Perhaps in time I will. For now, I will continue on with the book, stay as open minded as possible, collecting what inspiring gems I can.
Affirmations, art journal, 9 February 2006.
{synchronicity}
In Chapter 3, Julia Cameron discusses synchronicity, which she attributes to ‘answered prayers.’ To me, a prayer is an act of positive thinking. And I believe when we think positively, we invite positive change to occur in our lives.
If you realized how powerful your thoughts are, you would never again think a negative thought.
A bit of clarity literally came knocking upon my door last week. An unexpected conversation with someone who had the uncanny timing of bringing up the topic of the power of our thoughts. Yet another catalyst for positive thinking.
Pay attention to right now.
Think positive thoughts.
Focus on the details.
These messages seem to be sprinkled throughout my life lately. In the book I am reading. From the people I talk to. On the websites I visit. Synchronicity indeed.
So I pay attention. I do my best to keep my thoughts positive. And I focus on the details.
The aroma of jasmine green tea. The savory taste of fresh homemade bread. The sound of laughter. The smile of the employee at the grocery store. The colorful sketches on my daugther’s paper. A generous serving of bubble tea and encouragement from a friend. The white flecks of snow gently falling from the sky. Countless blessings. Life is good.
February 9th, 2006 at 3:16 pm
Melanie…I find myslef having the same problems with focusing on my work and tapping into my creative spring…which is why I think I am up all hours of the night working on my art. The quite and solitude it brings allows me to create without disruption. I agree with you on your thoughts about The Artists Way. I was hoping to get more fromt he book as I had heard so many good things about it, be something just didn’t click….like you I think I was expecting too much, or just maybe something different…
Sarah
February 9th, 2006 at 7:32 pm
Melanie:
The Artists Way isn’t for everyone. A couple of years ago I went to a Julia Cameron seminar with my friend who is an Artists Way fan. I basically went because of my friend, but thought I might get something out of it as well. It was an expensive lecture and what bothered me was that she would ask us a bunch of questions and then have us get into groups to discuss the answers. This happened QUITE a bit. I did get a few things out of it, but would’ve liked listening to her talk more. Also, the whole room was obsessed with morning pages. I struggle with journaling EVERY day, much less in the morning! Hang in there, I’m sure you’ll find something that will help…We all go through cycles of this. Not everyone works or thinks the same way. And there isn’t one answer for everyone. :)
February 9th, 2006 at 7:33 pm
Melanie, I relate completely to your difficulties in quieting the mind chatter. Like you, I try to have all of the pieces in place–the time, the materials, the space. In the end, it’s whether or not I can get my own brain to cooperate. More often than I’d like, that’s a problem. I just keep hoping that if I push hard enough, I’ll push through to the other side.
February 9th, 2006 at 7:33 pm
BTW: I LOVE your pages above!
February 9th, 2006 at 9:34 pm
these details are divine!
February 10th, 2006 at 2:07 am
Melanie-
I have to tell you that your writing about your frustration, your desire to be “in the perfect moment” are meaningful to all of us. And your disappointment re. the book are shared by many.
When I read your last paragraph about the things that are dear to you…the things you savor…the moments in time that make you the person you are, I understand why I love your artwork and your blog so much.
It’s all in the detail. (who said that?) But it’s true. And just as small, delicate details often result in arresting, emotional art, they can also lead the artist to fret and obsess over techniques, objects, or colors - when the artist should actually enjoy the process and be led by the soul on a creative journey.
The same is true with our lives. We desire to be one with nature, to be “in tune” with the universe. To taste the nectar of life in every drop that is offered to us. But when we hold out for the sweetest drop of nectar instead of allowing ourselves to taste any of the other drops, we may miss a banquet fit for the Gods!
Funny how life works, isn’t it?
You are on the right path, my friend.
Thanks for being generous enought to share it with us.
Deb
February 10th, 2006 at 6:26 am
i love the artwork…
and the story of the trouble tree…
i also kind of feel the same way
about the artists way…
i am doing it all and its
ok…but alot of it feels kind of..
repetitive
and maybe its supposed to be
so i’m trying to keep positive
and just go with it…
and like you, i hope that i haven’t
had my expectations set too high.
February 10th, 2006 at 9:27 am
did you create the artwork during your artfest
with miz mawn….very nice.
i was going to the the aw, but life is just too hectic at the moment. but i can see where you
are coming from. we do have such lofty expectations, yet creatives seem to bogged themselves down with such self-doubt. why is
that? wondering if it is the unpleasant truth
of the artist. this makes us the artists that
we are?
you know i think you rock!
happy friday
February 10th, 2006 at 12:42 pm
I also struggled with the Artist’s Way and in the end wondered what all the hoop-la was about. I think that some days we are filled with creation and inspiration and other days we are just observing to get us to that state. Why are we so hard on ourselves when we cannot produce? Perhaps we need to accept that there are times we just have to fill ourselves up. Struggle, stress, moments of blankness aren’t necessarily a bad thing. Those aspects of our life give us time to ponder; they push us to the next level and often give us clarity on what needs to be done next. Every moment in our life has purpose, whether we perceive it as stress or an opportunity is what makes the difference.
“Let things happen naturally, and do not force a certain outcome. That which is not natural will not be right.” ~Lao Tzu~
Perhaps it’s just as natural to have what we call “stress filled” days as it is to have creative ones and we should be more open to the flow of life, the balance of life.
Sandy
February 10th, 2006 at 12:45 pm
i haven’t read the artist’s way yet. i keep thinking that i’d like to. maybe someday. i, like you, have a studio and supplies and time in my day, but i also find it hard to “settle down” sometimes. and i’m wondering if the common denominator here is being the mother of young children.
i read lots of art blogs and it’s pretty easy to pick out the people who don’t have kids. the ones whose days involve lingering meals and spontaneous walks. don’t get me wrong — i am in no way criticizing. but i do think there is a difference for women who have to divide their attention between art and kids. morning pages sound great, but my two-year-old has awakened at 4am everyday this week, which makes me want to sleep until the very last second.
anyhow. my point is that maybe your struggle (and mine) comes from having to balance all the time. i’ll think good thoughts for you if you will think them for me!
February 10th, 2006 at 5:29 pm
when i first came upon the aw, i felt like i was searching for something outside myself to fix things. the truth is, nothing can do that for us. i hear your frustrations and i encourage you to keep going with it, pulling the gems free (like you’re already doing!) use what works, discard the rest, seems to me that life is like that in so many places. your artwork is gorgeous. i like the trouble tree idea, although, like you i have trouble leaving my “stuff” at the door of my studio. i try and leave it on the page though sometimes.
February 11th, 2006 at 3:00 am
words of wisdom, indeed. it’s in these moments of clarity that I feel a rush to create and a love for the inspiration my fellow artists/bloggers provide me with…
February 11th, 2006 at 1:07 pm
Thank you for writing with such honesty here. This inspires me to be more honest about my path, my journey. I had a lot of energy going into AW, but am finding that the book itself is not inviting me to keep that momentum going. I agree with a lot of what you have said here, but I am also going to stick with it to see what happens. The morning pages are such a good thing, when I do them, but I find myself frustrated by the idea of doing them…so I am not doing them. And I regret that. I guess people are obssessed with them for a reason so I will think about getting some mid-morning pages done now…
February 11th, 2006 at 1:08 pm
PS Love, love, love the art you have shared here. The trouble tree reminds me of the idea of a native american burden basket.
February 11th, 2006 at 9:32 pm
I just love this butterfly everytime I look at its beautiful. Is it okay if I keep a copy of it?
February 12th, 2006 at 10:06 am
Your recent posts and flickr pictures really resonate with me. I too feel a similar message coming from many sources and it has definitely gotten my attention.
Thanks for sharing your experiences
February 12th, 2006 at 10:42 am
Hi Melanie
I’m not doing the AW this time around but have done it a couple of times in the past. The first time I was doing it was with an internet newsgroup for support.
I really struggled with the terminology on my first pass through but it is worth struggling with it. Ideally you need to come out of it with more self-knowledge and more tricks for shifting yourself into art-mind (or whatever you like to call it).
If an exericise doesn’t have the desired effect then the challenge is to create one that does for you. Its by really rewriting the book as you go, and recreating the exercises to suit yourself that you will get the most out of it.
And that’s why I didn’t join in this time around - I’ve moved so far away from morning pages etc. that I thought I’d be interfering… however last night I realised I was still tuning into this AW group’s energy and so I’ve just set myself a set of exercises on the general themes (reworded where necessary) they bear little resemblence to the book but they will mean I get more out of being loosely in the same flow as all the others doing this work now.
And on expectations - its hard to get that right - I think Kat is right in saying having no expectation is best, but of course without some sort of expectation at all you wouldn’t have the motivation to start something like this…
And by the way - I love your collages
And the tree idea is a beautiful one even if it hasn’t worked the way you hoped.
February 14th, 2006 at 10:19 am
I love the idea of the trouble tree. Such a wonderful thing that you think of your studio as you do.