Self Portrait Tuesday {battle of the inner ages}
I first read the short story “Eleven” by Sandra Cisneros a few years ago while in college. At a time of self-discovery, I was really intrigued by the idea that we have a system of multiple selves within us — a four-year-year self, a seven-year-old self, a ten-year-old self and so on up to our current age. I think it puts an interesting twist on birthdays and aging. We can think of getting older as losing time, or using up the allotted life we’ve been given. Or we can choose to think of getting older as an addition, or expansion, of our being. Our inner soul growing year by year. Building upon the foundation of years past.
Although right now, my cranky three-year-old self really needs a nap, but my level-headed thirty-year-old self is telling me I have too much I need to do and there’s just no time to relax right now. I think I’ll ignore them both for a moment and listen to my twelve-year-old self who is saying, “Bring on the chocolate!”
November 9th, 2005 at 2:40 pm
and sometimes trying to parent all those inner selves is such a chore, but i try to remember to listen to them all and love them all.
great pic.
November 9th, 2005 at 4:36 pm
yea! you are back!
damn - i was always told i have
multiple personality syndrome…hee. now
i find out that it is called inner selves.
boy that would have saved me alot of heartache
had i known.
glad to see you back
November 10th, 2005 at 2:32 pm
I like this idea. Perhaps this is why I, at 28, still feel like I’m 18? I’m still the same girl I was 10 years ago…in love with my favorite blue jeans, Enigma and the sound of rain on the rooftops…excited and scared of the future, and determined to live my life without regrets.
I always love reading your blog, Melanie.
November 10th, 2005 at 3:20 pm
I was trying to explain to my 13yr old dd that I don’t feel that differently than I did when I was a kid or when I was 18. Maybe a little more confident, a little more relaxed, but not all that different. All those girls and young women are inside of me. She will find out. She’ll be able to see that some day.
November 11th, 2005 at 9:55 am
Such a cool photo.
November 11th, 2005 at 3:14 pm
Great concept, Melanie. I was just talking about this with one of my friends. She’s 48 and I’m 38. She says she feels 18 and I feel, I dunno — for me if feels more like a floating age, a suspended state of mind. 20’s maybe? But never past 30. But maybe that’s what 38 feels like, just a mix of them all like you are suggesting.
Beautiful picture too.
November 14th, 2005 at 4:04 pm
Fantastic shot…and I completely relate. Sometimes I’ll catch a glimpse of myself in a store mirror & I’ll think, “Who is that pudgy middle-aged woman?” And then I’ll realize that IT’S ME! I may be 36, but inside I still feel 22.